Saturday, April 28, 2018

DIVORCE: Mistaken Signals, an Aging Disposition

Divorce is dumb and it's tragic
image of a penny with 'In God We Trust' This blog post is about the unfortunate situation in this nation involving divorce. I have to say up front that I have seen far too many great marriages end in divorce because of what I'd call "mistaken signals." I almost had a divorce myself because of my own suspicious mind.
Marriage and divorce are both common experiences. In Western cultures, more than 90 percent of people marry by age 50. Healthy marriages are good for couples’ mental and physical health. They are also good for children; growing up in a happy home protects children from mental, physical, educational and social problems. However, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher. (click here)
Adapted from the Encyclopedia of Psychology
Here's a hypothetical situation that is so close to my own that I actually hate to bring it up, but if it's true for me and for others I have observed, then it's got to be the case for many. If I can help just one married couple avoid a needless divorce, then it's worth the effort.
  1. A man loses confidence in his own manliness, which is something that happens to the best of men as they age....
  2. He begins to watch for signs of changes in his wife which could signal her having contact with another man.
  3. The woman, even though she is faithful to her man, could lose faith in him as he slips into the bowels of suspicion. She's aware of his problem and at first it's cute, but after a time it becomes annoying because she feels that she has to justify everything she does.
  4. The man magnifies any change at all into a full blow issue, ramping up his observation of his wife in her daily activities. Perhaps she's late getting home a few nights from work, perhaps she has a few new phone numbers on the cell phone, or maybe new contacts she's texting to.
  5. He begins to monitor her email, watches her facebook, watches her activities on Google+. He leaves work a few minutes early to see if she's where she's suppose to be--alone, all the while verbally accusing her of infidelity and demanding to know who she's talking to.
  6. Now she is growing tired and frustrated with the accusations of things that she's not doing, so she begins to circle the wagon by changing her email password, defriending her husband on facebook, buying herself a throwaway cell phone for personal communications. Now he's made it a point to identify anyone and everyone she talks to. He installs a special app on her cell phone that enables him to monitor her conversations.
  7. His wife's efforts to keep her hubby isolated from her personal life (to keep him from contacting friends) is an even bigger sign to hubby that he's right, that his wife is cheating on him at every turn. He begins to follow her to and from work to see where she goes. He sits across the
    street from were she works to make sure she's where she's suppose to be. He installs a GPS tracker on the vehicle so he can follow her every move. He knows where she goes, how long she's there, and when she comes and goes. He's on to her, so he thinks...
  8. She grows tired of the difficulties, tired because her spouse is not supporting her efforts (like she's working two jobs), and she falters, throwing herself into another man's arms all the time looking for the man she married--a man who went AWOL some time ago.

Conclusion:

Now, there is no denying that the wife finally did do the very thing that her hubby was accusing her of, and if he actually catches her at it, he may feel vindicated of the allegation that some have assigned to his paranoia that "he's simply lost his mind."
In reality, if it hadn't been for his lack of self esteem and security as well as all the accusations, name calling, and aggressive behavior toward her friends--with whom noting was amiss--perhaps his wife wouldn't have faltered and failed in the end.

I ask you, who's fault is it if this married were to end in divorce?

Hers or his?

Should the hubby go in for a psych eval to determine whether he was having a senior-related moment?

How could this marriage be saved in the end analysis?






For the serious researcher:
ToganX.Info

Copyright©2014/Allan B. Colombo
www.alcolombo.us / al_colombo@hotmail.com
(Permission is given to republish blog posts providing
my contact information and copyright notice are included.)

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Sunday, December 3, 2017

The Solution to an Out of Control Congress

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I'm back!

In my last diatribe (blog post) I ranted and raved about the crybaby, whiny Leftists and their Liberal bleeding hearts throughout American society and the issue of President Donald Trump (click here).

I apologize for being so angry when I wrote that post. The fact is, these misguided folks are entitled to think and say as they wish. My only caution is NOT to allow them to dethrone this president based on seemingly popular OPINION because that is NOT how elections are conducted here in the U.S., especially where it involves seats as important as that in the Oval Office of the White House.


Frankly, judging by the antics of the past four or five presidents, we ought to call it the BIG HOUSE.

If you're not sure what "big house" means, check out the definition to the right, courtesy of Urban Dictionary.

What we've seen and heard over the last few months is encouraging. Many of the personal attacks launched by the political Left against Trump as well as others who appear to support him have not only tasted like sour grapes to the public, even Liberals, but many times they've actually backfired on those who launched them. The public have woken up from a long sleep, or so it would seem. Many of us are absolutely fed up with all the nonsense being reported by news media that should know better. Trump coined the term "fake news," and it's certainly a good description of what it really is.


We need to stop taking Washington's word for anything.

Here's the Solution to Congress' Problem

Did you know that originally Congress was slated to travel to the nation's capital to conduct the people's business for ONLY 6 weeks a year. The rest of the year they were to go back home to their families and their regular work. Herein lies the problem with the system as it is today.

Where early Congressmen were ordinary people etching out an ordinary living leading ordinary lives, today's Congressmen and Congresswomen are career POLITICIANS (that last word should have read LAWMAKERS but we know that most of them are political and not pro-Americans). If we had the same system that we had when this nation was formed, perhaps there wouldn't be such a disconnect between our Congress and its people.

We need Congressmen with their ear to the ground and their boots firmly planted on U.S. soil.

Al Colombo


For the serious researcher:
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Copyright©2014/Allan B. Colombo
www.alcolombo.us / al_colombo@hotmail.com
(Permission is given to republish blog posts providing
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Thursday, May 18, 2017

The 'Big Liberal, Whiny Crybabies'

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I took a few minutes to read a post on a long-time Jewish Friend on Facebook when I came to the realization that if the 'Big Liberal, Whiny Cry Babies' get their way with our newly elected President, it will set a precedence. Not only that, from this time forward, we are assured of the fact that if a Republican who truly represents Conservative values is elected to that post, that the 'Big Liberal, Whiny Cry Babies' will do their crying, rioting, killing, and disrupting all over again, so what's the use... right?

Here's the thing, a man was elected president supposedly because an overwhelming majority of Electoral Votes went to his bid for the presidency. To allow 'Big Liberal, Whiny Cry Babies' to tar and feather President Trump and run him out of the White House on a rail makes this nation look like a nation of fools. Here we are, some of the most immature and lackluster presidents since 1992--both parties included, and the Proletariat's want to use 'Political Terrorism' tactics to have it their way--like little kids rebelling against their mommies and daddies.

My message to you is that you are making a mockery of one of the biggest, foremost positions in society and treating it as if it's a dog catcher's job. If you're one of these whiny little Leftist creeps, here's what I think of you...


For the serious researcher:
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Copyright©2014/Allan B. Colombo
www.alcolombo.us / al_colombo@hotmail.com
(Permission is given to republish blog posts providing
my contact information and copyright notice are included.)

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Saturday, February 25, 2017

My Story: Two Major Spinal Surgeries Within Four Months

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For my friends who care and who would like to know, here's a somewhat short explanation regarding how these operations came to be along with an update on my recovery.

As you may or may not recall, a few years ago I began losing my balance and falling. Contrary to what someone we know may have told you, I did a lot of work in our new house in Orient. My problem after chopping and digging out that Formosa Tree in the back became even more problematic.

But before even that, my problems progressed to the point where my legs would just give out, often walking up or down a flight of steps. It became so bad that in November of 2015, when my wife, Linda, was in Michigan visiting with her daughter, I fell and laid on the floor for almost six hours until I got up enough strength to weather the pain of crawling down two flights of steps to my office where I had left my phone. I called the neighbor and he was able to get to me and dial up an ambulance. I had a cat scan at that time and I followed up with my regular doctor who wanted me to go see a specialist, which I did. This was in 2015.

After many tests, Xrays, and MRI’s, it was decided that I had a serious problem at the base of my spine. At the time we had no idea that there was an even more serious problem at the top of my spine. In March of 2016, the doc had me do an EMG, just to make sure there were no other issues. The EMG showed that there was a lot of cross signaling where, according to him, my body was working to find ways to get signals to the right places in the most unorthodox ways.

We met on a Monday or Tuesday in March, 2016, to discuss the oncoming operation on the lower back when he right away began talking about the upper neck area. He sent me in for another MRI on Wednesday and on Friday we all got back together. He said that there was a serious injury in the upper spine area and that if we did not take care of it, I would be paralyzed from head to foot within 6 months. He had a point, too, because by now I’m not on canes anymore, I’m on a walker and it was getting increasingly difficult for me to control my legs with that device.

I made the decision right there and then to move forward with the neck operation at once. He said, good, to be at the hospital Monday morning at 6:00. They had an operating room already set aside. I think what alarmed me the most was what he wasn’t telling me. It was the urgency in his eyes that told me that this was an issue like no other.

As far as I’m concerned, the operation was a success, and he said the same thing. What they did was remove three disks entirely in the neck. They drilled the vertebrae with two holes on the back sides, wrapped them with a cage, added a metal titanium plate, and screwed it all together. The xray showed three vertebrae hanging in mid air. :- ) He said they also placed a bone graft inside the cage so it would grow a shank of bone. (My last trip in to see him, which was probably in October of 2016, the xrays showed that the shank had almost completed its growth. He was very pleased with this. I’m getting ahead of myself.)

Almost right away after that operation I went from the walker to two canes, then to one. But it wasn’t long until all of this began to slip backwards until I was back on the walker. We got together at the last of June, 2016, to discuss the operation on the lower back.

Things at that point had gone from a 1-inch incision to an 8- or 10-inch--from the simple fusing of three vertebrae to the placement of metal plates and rods. This was not what I wanted to hear because along with it came a possible 2-year recovery with only 70% of my normal mobility to show for it. But the other option was to not get the op and he assured me that in due time I’d be paralyzed from waist to feet because of it.

Waking up on the other side of the op, I actually felt relief from the operation. The nurses showed me where the Morphine button was, but I only had to hit it a few times during my stay there. A nurse came to me shortly after my arrival and she showed me where the button was again, and I told her I knew where it was. She asked me why I wasn’t using it, and I told her the truth, that I felt better after the op than I did before, and that was the truth. I still can say that, even though I do have pain. But this pain is nothing like the other before the op.

It’s been a slow road to recovery after each op, at least to me. After my neck op I noticed that my fingers were a little better on the keyboard, but I was still only able to do 20 wpm and my norm was well over 100 wpm in my prime. One of the self-administered typing tests many years ago clocked me at 145 wmp. I bet I was doing 5 wpm before the first op. Now, I have not clocked it, but it’s pretty good, although control of my right arm is not as good, so it’s hard to hold it up to the keyboard and type, like it is right now. But even then, I can tell that it’s all coming back.

My walking, it’s a matter of 3 steps forward and 2 back, sometimes 3 back, sometimes even 4 back. But the overall direction is good. I can feel the strength coming back to my legs, but I have a feeling that it’s the connection with the muscles that I’m feeling, not more strength.

I have my good days, and I have my really bad ones. Each time I see my surgeon, he tells me how pleased he is with my progress. He told me once that a lot of his clients who have gone through so much trauma to the spinal nerve bundle do not make it off the walker. He said he knew I would because he knows I have will power, and that I do. I also have a lot of friends who have prayed for me a good long time. Thank you, and thank you God!

Al Colombo


For the serious researcher: ToganX.Info

Copyright©2014/Allan B. Colombo www.alcolombo.us / al_colombo@hotmail.com (Permission is given to republish blog posts providing my contact information and copyright notice are included.)

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Friday, February 10, 2017

Credit Card Fraud Stats - Protect Yourself from Being Scammed

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Crime Prevention: GUEST EDITORIAL

Email scams have been around since the beginning of the Internet age. People have received all sorts of offers and schemes, and have been victimized over and over again. For one, there’s the Nigerian email scam which promises the reader a share of a very large sum of money which the letter sender cannot claim yet because of civil unrest in his country.

Most often than not, the letter sender pretends to be a general or a prince from Africa. There have been many variations of this scheme and the promises have become bigger and bigger. One thing remains true though, the recipient of the email is asked to deposit money to a certain account, and that’s the last he will ever hear from the letter sender. Bye bye money.

According to research, scam artists use email as their main point of contact when trying to dupe people. About 48 per cent of credit card scams originated from an email. So, if you want to keep yourself from becoming part of the statistic, you better learn to assess the kind of offers you respond to. First of all, there’s no such thing as an instant winning. If you didn’t buy a ticket to enter a raffle draw or joined any sweepstakes promotions, then you couldn’t possibly win.

These scammers are able to get names and email addresses from marketing companies, so don’t be fooled into thinking that they know you. For more ways to protect yourself from scammers and thieves, read our clear and well-researched infographic.

We’ve gone to great lengths to come up with the data and figures, so do read it and share with everyone you know. Vigilance is key.

Credit Card Fraud Stats - Protect Yourself from Being Scammed





For the serious researcher:
ToganX.Info

Copyright©2017/Allan B. Colombo
www.alcolombo.us / al_colombo@hotmail.com
(Permission is given to republish blog posts providing
my contact information and copyright notice are included.)

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